I am a results oriented person. I like to see what comes from what I do. If I put time into a project, a relationship or anything, I like to know that the time I spent is producing visible results.
It’s hard for me to be patient. Especially in times of need, I want to see that what I do produces the results that I am after. When that doesn’t happen, I can find myself discouraged and second guessing the direction I am going.
The last few weeks, I have been extremely busy. I worked many consecutive hours getting our website redesign finished. I spent a lot of time helping my wife and taking a bigger role with our children as she was run down from the 1st trimester of pregnancy.
I have been working part time at nights, so from 9pm to 1am I’m at work. And I’ve also been searching for additional part and full time ways to earn more while praying over how to balance new work with fulfilling my role in running this ministry. I’ve been trying to get our tax information together, and keep up with all the daily demands of regular life.
And God has been helping me. I’ve found myself able to accomplish more and to persevere in a way I never have before. But I have been facing times of discouragement. When I spend all the time I have working on either this ministry, searching for new work, or working my part time job, and our situation doesn’t seem to be improving, it can be disheartening.
As I read the Bible last night, God brought me to this verse:
“I replied. ‘But my work seems so useless! I have spent my strength for nothing and to no purpose. Yet I leave it all in the Lord’s hand; I will trust God for my reward.” (Isaiah 49:4,NLT).
I realized that as I was counting up all the work I’ve been doing and looking for the results I wanted to see, I was relying totally on me, and not leaving any of it in God’s hands. My sight has become so short. I want instant results, and I want to do it myself.
But God’s wisdom is greater than that. By taking me to this verse, God is showing me that the results in my life are in His hands. I am only to do what He calls me to do, and by faith, I trust the results to him. And what a relief! Rather than being discouraged, I am hopeful, as I know God has a plan and the power to accomplish whatever He chooses to in my life.
By trusting that He loves me, I know what He works will be for my good and the good of His Kingdom. And I have discovered a new freedom, knowing that I can continue to work with my confidence in what God will do, whether I see the results yet or not.